Friday, December 16, 2005

Treats and Treats

In honor of the Christmas season, I would like to discuss one of my favorite topics: treats.

I love them, I am drawn to them, I give significant thought to how I can get more of them. Unfortunately for me, and this statement may seem sad, they are a big part of my life.
My obsession with treats started at a young age. I feel as if most of my childhood revolved around my conquest to get as much candy as possible. For instance, I remember being really small, probably about 4, and at the store with my mom. There was a huge bin full of those gelatin squares covered in sugar made by Brach's, I don't know if they make them anymore. I remember standing there and gazing at the delicious candy and asking myself, "Can I just take some?" I think my subconcious knew that it was bad, but the call of the sugar cane was too strong and I grabbed a grape gelatin square. I kept it hidden in my pocket until we got home. When we arrived, I ran straight to the guest bathroom, a place that would prove to be a haven for all my future criminal behavior. I felt that it was the one place in my house that I could not be discovered. I would later prematurely open one of my Christmas presents in the same guest bathroom. My mom of course recognized my suspicious behavior and tracked me down...
"Angela? What are you doing in there?"
"Nothing" (sounds of candy wrappers being crumpled and stashed)
"Open the door right now..."

And just like that, I became both thief and treat addict...

My love affair with sugar would continue throughout my childhood. It drove me to steal candy bars from my brother's school fundraiser, eat bakers chocolate straight, and sneak the halloween candy out of the bowl before the trick-or-treaters arrived. Unfortunately this theme still continues throughout my life...

One recent example occurred just a few weeks ago. Monday is my long day right now. I have school all day and then I have to teach about eight flute lessons, the last one ending at 8:30. About three weeks ago I was teaching and hadn't eaten all day. I was starving, which in the life of Angela means I am grumpy beyond reason. I had a short break before lessons, so I ran next door to the Walgreens to grab something to nibble on and subdue my villian alter ego.
I walked in and in a zombie-like trance was pulled into the candy aisle. A normal human being would buy just one thing to tide them over till they could eat protein,
but again the call of the sugar cane was too powerful...
I bought starbursts, red vines, and a caramello for dessert. I could barely make it to the car, where like a wild animal I ripped into the red vines. By the time I had reached my next lesson I had eaten an entire package of red vines and half of the starbursts. I was totally ill...and ashamed.

So as you can see I am a complete sweet tooth of magnificent proportions.
Yes world, I can eat an entire big piece of cheesecake, I love the big cadbury cream eggs at easter, and the more frosting the better.
You will never hear me utter those sad words: "This is too rich"
It simply is never too rich for me.
I guess you could think of me as a superhero of sorts. I cannot leap tall buildings in a single bound, but I can eat five s'mores in a row!
In conclusion, I would just like to wish you all a very Happy Christmas, may you eat all the treats you desire and find comfort knowing that somewhere there is a girl who on Christmas Eve is not only dreaming of sugar plums, but also pumpkin pie, doughnuts, eggnog, sugar cookies, cake...mmmm...cake...

9 Comments:

At 12:33 PM, Blogger Nancy said...

Brandon just offered me some Halloween candy... you know, the crap candy that is still left in December. Glad to know we all have sweet tooths, I just have to sneak candy when my kids' aren't looking or they make me share.

 
At 2:53 PM, Blogger Preston Smith said...

My name is Preston Smith and I am a treataholic!

Angela, it is good to know that there are people who suffer from the same elements that I do. When I was 7 years old and staying at my grandparents house for christmas, I ate every Hersheys Kiss the home had to offer, even last years christmas's remains. I also managered to eat all of the chex mix. My parents still tell the story of returning from christmas shopping finding me laying on the coutch complaining of a belly ache, with a mound of wrappers the size of the christmas tree it's self. I ended up punking it all up that night and have never eaten chex mix since. However I recently devoured a bag of the new cherry hersheys kisses (highly recommended!) in a half an hour!
Angela, you are not alone!

 
At 10:00 PM, Blogger the doze said...

May all of your wildest sugar plum, donut and cake dreams come true this holiday season. Some call it the season of giving, but I say keep all of the candy you can find... it's every man, woman, and child for him or herself...especially if there are Dots, Mike and Ike's, or Rolo's involved.

 
At 5:23 AM, Blogger VAWritingQT said...

If you haven't already, I suggest you read _Candy Freak_ by Steve Almond. You will find you are on the "High Functioning" side of the glucose devouring spectrum, which may be of some comfort to you during the holidays.

 
At 8:42 AM, Blogger Chris said...

I'm afraid I have some serious competition in the blogging world now doll! I am peeing my pants! I always knew you were a treat fiend, but didn't realize the extent of it. If it makes you feel any better once, when I was little, I ate an entire bag of hershey kisses, but only after I set them on the heat vent to get them all warm and melty. I ate so much chocolate I gave myself heart palpitations... Long live the Peanut Butter Cup!!

 
At 7:24 AM, Blogger Nancy said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 7:25 AM, Blogger Nancy said...

Ditto on Candy Freak by Steve Almond. I already told Chris about it, and I think I mentioned it to you. I love that book! I've become even more obsessed with candy... as long as it doesn't involve coconut.

 
At 10:03 AM, Blogger Goose said...

mmmm...cheesecake...mmmm

 
At 11:05 AM, Blogger Nancy said...

I'm mailing you and Chris both some Valomilks... Brandon found them a couple of weeks ago at a store by his brother's and we're going there this weekend. Have you finished Candy Freak yet?

 

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